Tag: funny scifi

  • Eyeball Chewer

    Eyeball Chewer

    by Aaron Garrison Care instructions for Eyeball Chewer: 1. Keep a steady supply of fake eyeballs for him to chew. Remember: he does not discriminate between fake and real. 2. He may suckle his own eyeballs from time to time, and this his fine. Despite the discharge, they are very strong, and his eye stalks, stronger. 3. Do not anger Eyeball Chewer. His teeth are as sharp as they appear, and there’s another row behind those. 4. Don’t freak out if his penises go erect. He will not mount you, usually.

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