“This is Carla at the Off-Planet Tax Return helpline, how can I help you?” “We are collective. We file jointly or separately?” “How many US citizens do you have in your collective?” “Three hundred fifty-two of us are citizens, yes. Bob is not.” “Are you married, as defined by US law?” “We are three hundred fifty-two conscious entities melded into one harmonious being for over five thousand years, and also Bob. This is marriage?”

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