Dear Aunty Stanky,

I possess an extensive vocabulary, but I underutilize it in public because so few people have the capacity to comprehend me.  How can I best genetically modify the human race to properly apprehend my consummately perspicuous diction?

THESAURUS ADORUS

Dear Thessy –

Loquaciousness often precludes profundity.  Maybe take baby steps – say, introduce the teeming masses to words like Understanding, Love, Togetherness…

Nah, just messing with you.  If they can’t parse words even high schoolers should understand, they should be ground into meal and used to feed those with better brains.  Let’s talk later, maybe send me an email?  (I have children, but they can hardly spell, so…)

Always ready to be your (well, you decide)

Aunty Stanky