Dear Aunty Stanky,
Should I be concerned about the mysterious footsteps and rattling chain sounds I keep hearing from my attic? Also, do you think it’s weird that my trailer has an attic?
Sincerely,
Parked in a Cemetery
DEAR PARKED:
No, of course you shouldn’t be concerned! It’s not an attic (erm, duh), but instead an incursion by the nightmare creatures from the realm of Zxzxyzz, whose soul purpose is to eradicate all lesser life forms from the galaxy. Especially those living in venues usually targeted by tornados.
(Good thing about that cemetery plot, though — you’ve thought ahead.)
Always (working on your epitaph),
Non-shanty Aunty
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