Dear Funny Aunty Stanky,

My boyfriend just confessed that he’s got a secret crush on the neighbor’s vicuña! I didn’t even know that he was talking about one of the two wild South American camelids, which live in the high alpine areas of the Andes, the other being the guanaco, which lives at lower elevations! What should I do?

MISS M OF THE MOUNTAINS

Dear Miss M –

Move to a lower elevation.  Problem solved!

Always the height of wisdom,

Aunty Stanky

[Visit us regularly for insights and advice from our funny aunty, the inimitable Stanky Squid. She’s the aunty of our own corporate spokesmascot, Squishy, and obviously it’s a notable and talented family. Her sense of humor is a little different from her nephew’s, but we love her all the more for it.

Do you have a question for our funny aunty? It can be trivial or philosophical, or even trivially philosophical. Aunty Stanky’s advice is free, but it’s not worthless, nor is it guaranteed. We hope you find her answers as befuddling and amusing as we do. They might not be funny ha ha, but they’re always funny. Aunty Stanky can be queried via our contact form.]