Dear Aunty Stanky:

If we discovered a means to teach dogs to reason as do humans, should we? Do we risk corrupting caninekind or is it our duty to assist expanding man’s best friend’s appreciation of life?

BARKING ABOUT IN THE BIG APPLE

Dear BARKING:

Judging by your, shall we say, inventive use of grammar and failure to form a cohesive sentence, I’m pretty sure you’re actually a dog to begin with. So here’s my reply:

BAD DOGGY. BAD, BAD DOGGY!

Always your master,

Spay & Neuter Stanky